Writer’s Block: Lame jobs

What’s the worst job you’ve ever had?

Live Journals Writer’s Block



job I have ever had…

Without a single doubt that is definitely one of our old clients. We used to work there every Thursday, boss one of the kind it don’t matter if the worlds coming to end your still wanted to come kind of jobs. Also the kind if the phone rings in the morning, you pray it means you don’t have to show up !!!

The mother had energy problems so she never cleaned anything, with that house who wouldn’t have energy problems (no offense meant). The youngest daughter ADHD, although it’s classified as an attention span disorder… The way that kid was, I called her HDD — Hyper Destructive Disorder, I never noticed an signs of ADHD, just that she practically demolished the place lol. The elder daughter was going to and from collage and planning a wedding… So she was in the boat, trash it but don’t leave it better then it was found 8=)

To top it off, they had like 6 dogs and two floors. Oh my word was that house a nightmare…

Every week there would be garbage piled everywhere, leftover food, dishes, snacks, homework, dog wastes, clothes, everything plus infinity composited into one massive mess and us two stooges (workin’ cheap) had to pick it all up, no one in the house ever lifted a bloody finger : (can you say taken advantage of). Just bending over half way would get my nose running and sneezing from proximity to the hardwood floor, what was _left_ of it that is. With my allergies I usually travel ‘fully loaded’ with a paper towel in each pocket but it wasn’t enough for over there.

I don’t mean no disrespect and have nothing against them (nice family) but, holy guacamole ! If they ever tried to sell that house, no one on earth would buy the place. The family would have to burn the house down, fumigate the ashes, then drop a tactical nuke on the vacant lot before rebuilding… It really was that bad man, like if you had to sit on the floor to do something, you’d want to disinfect your ass on the way out kind of nasty.

Needless to say, when the client couldn’t afford us any longer…

when I heard we were being let go



I’ve had to do lots of crap over the years but there are only two jobs that I’ve ever regretted having to do. To me work is work, that’s it — you get your fat ass out of bed and go to work, even if… You’d rather be anyplace but >_>. That was the dirtiest, most stressful, most exhausting job I’ve ever had to live with and I’m glad it’s gone.

This reminds me of a scene in Wild Hogs when Martin Lawrence (a plumber) comments about wearing condoms on his shoes:

Tim Allen: Did you ever wake up one morning and wonder what happened to your life?

[John Travolta nods his head]

Tim Allen: You know, I thought my life would be an adventure. All of a sudden, I’m a suburban dentist.

Martin Lawrence: Look, Doug, I feel your pain, man. I mean I swore I would never return to a job where I had to where condoms on my shoes.

John Travolta: You’re still at The Firm?

Martin Lawrence: Yea. I get yelled at by an ungrateful wife. I swear the whole thing has made me…

Tim Allen: …a wimp.

Martin Lawrence: I was gonna say miserable.

Martin Lawrence: [pause] What? You think I’m a wimp?

Tim Allen: No, I thought you were gonna say wimp, so I’d thought I’d say it for you.

John Travolta: You’re a wimp, Bobby. I’ll say it. I mean you’re afraid of women. It’s kinda embarrassing.

William Macy: I’m afraid of women.

John Travolta: You’re afraid to talk to women. Bobby’s afraid they’ll kill him in his sleep.

[Tim Allen and John Travolta laugh]

William Macy: Wow… now I’m really afraid of women.

Wild Hogs is a good movie (y), I liked the end scene though hehe… When they’re riding and Macy ends up on the wrong side of the road, and he’s like, “Yeah!” he had finally made it without crashing into something. And his friends are there, and then they look ahead, and oh shit! And crash while he’s driving off chuckling. You could say that the Code Monkey had the last laugh xD