Month: July 2008

Another day older and deeper in insanity.

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Another day as good as gone…

Managed to get through work in one more or less antagonized piece. Had a few grapes on the way home but otherwise skipped lunch altogether. Joined TG#1 for some of Snipers training, managed to spend some time with Ghost, Jonsi, Nick, and Caern. Really, it’s the most gaming I’ve done all month :. One thing I am glad of though, in the rounds where I was the “last man standing”, I generally did good !

I think Caern was a little surprised by the speed of my pistol whippin’ backhand hehe. A tango popped the door behind me in an area I was being cautious about clearing, snapped around and plugged ~5 .40 Caliber rounds into the threat and slammed the door shut in an eye blink >_>. I’m proud to say though that in the end, Nick, Caern, and Me managed to complete the mission without casualties hehe.

I was quite delighted to have a few time to join a few old friends in my “office” on XFire. Hmm, them were some good days (y). But sadly, I didn’t have much time to spend with my friends… As the Chief FH decided it was time to monopolize my time on a project. Why bother though? By my experience and mathematical capabilities, I estimate the supplies stored int he car will be just as shitty and disorganized within 3 years or less the way things are.

Honestly, I’ll never understand it… She creates her own problems and wants the rest of us to deal with it, then applies it recursively… FFS at least be consistent in a purposeful manor. Wait, wtf am I saying? This is my mother we’re talking about lol.

Had triple helpings of dinner… About the only real meal I’ve had all day +S. What can I say? I’m like a camel: living on flumes but still workin’ like a dog. Shit, I need a vacation!!!

But this isn’t the kind of business where you get a vacation, without having to work your ass off along the way; let along a vacation alone.

A green organge

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I really need a vacation, one far far way… Away from fuck heads like those that surround me.

Is it to much to ask to be respected at least as much as a person with an IQ of 5? Heh, lving here I wouldn’t be surprised if my IQ was less then that ^_^. I’m just so dang tired of suffering fools…


I don’t like to repeat myself, repeatedly; I don’t like tobe treated like a recursive function when not given an algorithm that can be solved by recursion — you ask me a question 10 times with only 2 answers, you’re likely to get the *same* answer 10 times, or given the bird. I’ve actually never seen a spoken question that would fit well with recursion, other then to annoy people.

I’m tired of FucKheads who think I have absolutely nothing to do, that could possibly be more important then what they want done, instantly! I’m tired of being bossed around by those without any competence on the subject… (Flibin’ parental unit). After 20 years on earth, I’d rather think I have something called a brain by now?

I’m just so fucking tired of this fucking place…….

Earlier when questioned about my ‘short temper’ and ‘disrespectful’ attitude of late, I rathe felt like shouting:

“You don’t respect me, why the hell should I respect you fool?”

I don’t suffer fools well!!!!

People that never learn, piss me off royally… How many times do you have to annoy someone before you find out your annoying them ^_^.

What is incontrovertible is that for all of humanity, there are people that you would rather not have to deal with, and those people, throughout history, are the Fuckheads. — David R. Kendrick

There is a very large element missing in my life, if my life could be classified as a life these days… Maybe if it wasn’t for that, this hell would be more bearable?

I’d probably still be RPTFO 90% of the time but at least 10% of the time could be worth while >_>. There’s just nothing I can do about it, short of shooting the mother fuckers and going to jail… That actually might sound preferable to some people but I’m not willing to do anything like that.

I just want so peace in my life without getting drastic, is that to much to ask for?

To be treated like a damn human being, not some kind of sub-human slave creature..

To be free to do as I need, not ordered about by incompetent dip shits.

To actually be able to use *my* free time as *I* see fit, as I’ve often said/thought:

“GOD is the only person allowed to control my life without my permission and your not GOD !!!!”

I don’t want to have a damn headache every day — fucking fuck heads !!!

One thing I like about my times around [SAS], I’m a *person* who *makes* himself *useful*… Around here, I feel more like an *asset* waiting to be *used*… Maybe [SAS] has spoiled me by actually treating me kindly? I dunno anymore.. but they sure beat this place lol.

My ~/Documents/Personal folder fills up every now and then, because generally when I’m miserable or have strong feelings… positive or negative, I usually write what I feel. It’s not like anyone around this place listens or cares, just another fact of life in this rats nest.

I’d rather leave it behind, sit around a campfire, and mutter “just another memory to burn” but I know I’ll probably never be free.

Wouldn’t it be nice, not to walk through hell each day, for no purpose other then the ‘joy’ of others at watching the thrashing about.

I think I’m going to bed, the config, settings, and search modules can wait for another time… And I also need to dig out my last PC-BSD disk, I downloaded the last release ISO just in case but don’t want to burn a disk if I don’t have to. Over this weekend I want to get to work on those articles for Olander.

Another week of working like a dog, without rest in between… But at least this weekend, I’ll be off work 3 days… So the only problems should be the fuckheads that like to monopolize my life without permission and keep me from getting stuff done during my free time. What I *want to do* is work on NPM, [SAS], the articles for Olander, and tie up a few loose ends…

How much time I actually get to spend on any of it over the 26-28 ‘th remains to be seen, knowing my family :

I need a freaking vacation !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Tired… I think my sleep/work patterns of late are starting to get to me :

Manged to get some time in on TG#1, even if it was some ‘solo’ dynamic assaults.

I’ve also gotten another module imported, and another that would be ready if I didn’t have to port it from using the Qt3 Support library… lol.

It shouldn’t take to much work to get the portconfig module ready for import but, my brain needs some rest :. And I’m stuck going back to work soon (an ~hour) on top of it 🙁

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Oy, I dunno whats worse….

Having to be at work by 1000 or being home from work before 1000 :

crasheed, caught the end of office space while waiting for Matrix Reloaded to start, and slept through most of it looool.

Well, at least I have whatever portion of the day my family doesn’t monopolize free…

the nights antics

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I was rather happy to see that SourceForges SVN services were back up to a decent speed, other wise I probably would’ve gone to bed instead of getting back to work :

I managed to finish the work on the project file, I had inhaled the qmake manual before dinner ;-). I knew exactly what I wanted, test works all been done in a ‘one lump sum’ directory… Which is the style that I really hate, to much crap to visually grep through when looking for parts of the project.

The build format that I desire is basically like:

Makefile -> top level, non recursive make
doc/ -> documentation files
dist/ -> files ready to install (all done)
obj/ -> object files and crap from moc / building docs, etc
src/ -> source code files
src/module/ -> source code files for module

Which is basically what I’ve setup, maybe I’m just spoiled by the layout of FreeBSDs source tree and build system… hehe.

I was quite happy to find that as usual, Qt makes life easier not harder xD. It only took the fine (if short) manual and a little bit of trial time to get more or less what I wanted out of it, all the better! Without having to worry about a recursive trail of makefiles. When it comes to recursive makes, I have no problem with the concept, I just don’t care much for it.

I figured that if I couldn’t get what I wanted out of qmakes project files that I would have to do things manually. I don’t really have a problem with hand crafting makefiles but I really prefer not to have to maintain them, let along risk leaving something behind that needs a Bachelors of GNU Makeology to understand fully.

I did manage to get one module (essentially) imported into the SVN tonight and I’ve almost got another ready to go in. But before I commit it, I want to get the things refresh() slot sorted out. To do that, I just need to clear the m/v I guess but that can wait until tomorrow’ish.

As I often have said, laptops make poor pillows !

There’s about 5 more modules to import, as soon as they are adapted and ready to roll that is. Right now I’m in advantageous territory code wise but as usually, my working environment is, uhh… “Hostile” to say the least to productivity.

Maybe if anyone in this fuckin’ family knew an ounce of computers, let along programming, the bastards would let me work in peace rather then in pieces !!!!!!!

Source Forge SVN slow !!!

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Bah humbug !!!

Tried to checkout a working copy of Neo Ports Manager over SVN, that took twenty minutes or so… Created an independent branch and the starting directory structure for the work I need to get imported, plus copied a few files from the trunk that I also want there.

That took at least 10 minutes to commit..

Looking on Source Forge, I can see that two other people have filed about the SVN services being so dang gum slow.

Looks like it might be awhile before I finally get my latest stuff under revision control +S.

Refusual to live with half my network offline

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Muahuahauhauahauha!!! It works, it works !!!!!

To make a long story short, in order to setup ur phone lines the cable company had to put the modem where there was a jack within reach. Which meant my room, because it’s the only one you don’t have to route a cable from here to timbuktu!

They also hooked up a second modem in the living room for us to hook up our router to, only problem? I need the router in my bedroom to avoid the OpenBSD 4.3/WPA issue or make some drastic changes instead of hooking her up via wire.

I’ve been mentally thinking about switching them as soon as I noticed that the cable guy didn’t leave anything hooked up to the jack, then it clicked in my head.

The set top (cable) box is probably just a signal repeater taht relays information without concern for routing information. They probably had to have the modem hooked up to the land lines in order to dial into the modem and tell it the setup information for the phones.

We are totally land line less until the phone company gets off their fat asses and forks over and the land lord gives the cable company written permission to hook up, which is unreliable at best.

I yanked the stuff, disconnecting the phone from the one; then the cable and power from both, and switching modems. Plugging them both in to power and then setting up the rest. Hooked up the phone and sure enough, it worked without issue.

Hooked up the other modem in my room and moved the router but I couldn’t et any external routes :-(. So shifting from plan A to plan B (guessing the modem was tied to the cable box), I went to switch set top boxes until I saw what happened, the cable must have fallen when I tied off the Ethernet cable at the modem and I forgot to plug the dang thing in ^_^. Ok, so I’m schlemiel…

But I was right the first time hehe 🙂

And now as soon as I get the power plug (read lack of) situation sorted, I’ll have my file server back online! And once I’ve got the booting issue sorted on the other computer, I can get slacking at installing linux on that one and jetting ovr the wifi drivers.

I hooked the CD-ROM back up to the machines secondary EIDE channel as the master but no luck, even as secondary slave. Since I’ve proven it’s not the cable, I’m going to have to take a look at the jumpers and probably see if I can google a manual.pdf of some sort. If screwing with those settings don’t work, well I guess I’ll need to dd myself a floppy disk to start the install.

As long as the file server gets back online, I can live without a 4th system running. Heck, once upon a time… Any body having four computers at home would probably have to be another Warbucks to afford it hehe. But in my case, 2 out of 4 PCs were free, pardoning the cost of a a sprig of PC2700 to get the one girl functional.

You know, technology is insanely simple — it just takes a lunatic to realize it!

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To damn tired to work… To wide awake to sleep :

Ended up stuck workin’ instead of attending Medics live op, and working like a Beaver in the hopes of getting done early lol.

Stuck working the weekend as well… but only light hours thankfully. And next week is a three day weekend for all intents and purposes, no work that Monday 🙂

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I recently heard that they are making Terminator 4, I can’t help but be interested ^_^. Action flicks and Science Fiction are of course two of my favorite types of movies.

Earlier today, I was thinking about it. In general the Terminator Universe has always presented me with some what of a paradox, in Terminator John Connor and Skynet essentially create the impetus for their own creation.

Yet, how could they possibly exist in the future: in order to create themselves in the past!

Let us postulate that such a thing is impossible and that at some point their creation must have come apart through the natural flow of time. I admit, while it is quite possible for Sarah Connor to have had a son named John. It is rather improbable or quite probable depending on your frame of mind, that an artificial intelligence or super computer the likes of Skynet could have crept into existence [yet] but hell, it is a movie after all !!!!

In which case when Skynet sends the first Model 101 back in time to assassinate Sarah Connor before its greatest enemy, John Connor can be born. Is ‘time line 0’ the first part of the time flow.

John Connor sends Kyle Reese back in time to protect Sarah Connor, altering history in the process: thus creating a new path in time, ‘time line 1’

John Connors father is now Kyle Reese from the future in time line 0, Sarah Connor is now warned of the future and tries to prepare John for it, potentionally creating an even more effective form of John Connor, who will lead the human resistance in time line 1’s future against skynet, then that of time line 0.

The crushed arm and CPU of the Terminator find their way into Cyberdyne Systems hands, leading Miles Dyson to create Skynet, bypassing Skynets original creation in much the same way as John Connor.

Now that John Connor of time line 1 is more effective then the John Connor of time line 0 at fighting Skynet. The new Skynet sends a more lethel killing machine back in time, the T-1000, in an attempt to kill the young John Connor. John Connor sends back a reprogrammed Model 101 to protect himself but this too ultimately changes history, creating another alternate flow of time, ‘time line 2’ when history is changed in time line 1’s past.

Learning from the Terminator about the history of Skynet in their own flow of time, time line 1. The Connors embark to destroy Skynet before it is completed, changing history themselves…

The creator of Skynet is destroyed, the data is destroyed (although for us more computer savvy types, the probability of backups on or off site surviving is quite high). The arm is destroyed, the CPU is destroyed, both Terminators are destroyed, and John Connor is further prepared to lead the resistance against the machines.

This leads to a fork of time line 1, creating the aforementioned ‘time line 2’ in which the method of creation from time line 1 for Skynet no longer occurs.

However the method by which Skynet was originally created in time line 0, is still uncertain… Now if we postulate that the original creation of Skynet within time line 0, leading to Kyle Reese and the first Model 101 being sent back in time to change history. Was in fact a Department of Defense related project, like the Cyber Research Systems work under General Brewster in Terminator 3…

Skynets birth has merely been delayed, Judgement day occurs late, John Connor and Kate Brewster’s future in time line 2 leads to the Skynet of time line 2 sending back a super weapon, the ‘T-X’ back in time to time line 0s past, before Skynets own creation… In effect changing history again when the ‘T-X’ begins killing off members of the human resistance, in an attempt to cripple the resistance before it is even created.

Thus causing a fork of time line 2 resulting in ‘time line 3’ being created when the T-X begins killing off people. The third Model 101 sent back by Kate Connor to protect John Connor and herself in the past is ultimately succesful, into which they are now much more formidable foes for Skynet in the *new* future or time line 3.

Where time line 3 is the superposition of all the events within time lines that lead to it’s creation, except for elements not merged because of the alterations or ‘created’ time lines caused by said events.

e.g. 2004 in time line 3 is different then that of time line 2, where the T-X does not exist yet because it is created in the future, which is a future that does not exist yet because Skynet was created by Cyberdyne Systems in time line 1, which occurred because of events within time line 0 that caused a change in history…

You could say I believe in the possibility of destiny but not paradoxes, even if the concept of a paradox is more then occasionally abused by sci-fi writers.

And I think people are right, I just think to damn much lol. But hey, in lack of interesting things to try and analyze… Whats wrong with a little TV to supply the input?

It’s not like anyone has invented a time machine yet or a way of proving the dynamics of time travel, if such a thing is even within mans capability.

Besides, unlike in real life (if time travel ever occurs) you can’t foul up the space time continuum if you don’t get it right because it’s only a movie :-).