The Ultimate Zombie Fighting Kit

This is in my humble opinion, the ultimate kit for fighting zombies, in the event that you should ever find yourself stuck in such a horror flick:

2 x Swords in scabbards across the back. A pair of wakizashi or a wakizashi and katana pairing would work perfectly, or something else along those lines. While technically caring for a katana in some form of post-apocalyptic zombie invasion would be a major drag, such a weapons cutting ability would be seriously useful. Either way a single sword is more than likely going to be overwhelmed and shorter blades are less likely to get in the way in doors. Using a chain saw is more likely to get you or a friendly killed than the zombies.

4 to 6 x Knives. 1 or 2 along side each boot for backup; plus another pair along the waist/legs for use as needed. Personally I think a Kukri or two would be handy, save the rest for emergencies or quick throws. You can never have enough knives in a zombie fight. Include some shuriken if possible (needle type are probably more relevant).

2 to 3 x Semi-automatic pistols. Capacity is more important than stopping power, as long as  it handles head hunting sufficiently. Although going akimbo (bring a 4th pistol) might be useful against a zombie swarm, using your strong hand to fire until dry then swapping it to the weak, as you draw the next pistol with your strong hand is likely better. Few people can reload like Lara Croft and head shots tend to be more reliable in such dire straights, unless having a minigun would be the only thing capable of saving your bacon ;). Probably best if they all can share magazines as well as cartridges, for obvious reasons: reloading on the run and through a rare lull in targets is easier that way. Arguably the main limitation is weight. If dual wielding, make sure to use tracers so you leave a round chambered by reload time. The reason? Because if you’ve got to slap in two mags and rack two slides, you’re gonna be zombie chow.

1 x A primary weapon. An assault carbine or SMG is probably the best balance of accuracy/ammo. Shotguns are useful against swarms but limited in ammunition capacity, and the “Dream” weapon for zombie fighting doesn’t exist. Namely a double barrelled, semi-automatic shotgun fed from a bag of shells. Save the scatterguns for when there’s a well rounded group of people to fend off zombies with. Personally I would fancy an H&K MP5 or an old M2 carbine, both being much lighter all around than the CAR15/HK416 family and more than powerful enough, unless again it’s time to reach for a minigun. If not using swords, slinging an uzi or a sawed off shotgun across the back for backup, is a good idea.

+ Explosives and Water. Always useful in a pinch, and sometimes an incendiary would be useful. Exposed hand grenades would be unwise, or anything else that could be “armed” by a zombie yanking at it, or pulling/crushing. This makes something like dynamite more valuable, but has the downside of course being that you might be dead before it gets lit and blown. At least one canteen is useful, in case of being separated from other survivors or temporary stranded.
+ Steel tipped boots. ‘nough said.
You now weigh at least 15-20 lbs heavier without counting the ammunition, explosives, or water. The ability to take on a good 80+ zombies without stopping on the other hand, is worth it. Just be sure to get in shape before dooms day.
When you consider how unlikely it is that you’ll be able to find a hill top surrounded by motion-tracking minuguns and a mega load of ammo/power, let along reach it alive for one reason or another: it is a very good thing that need for such an “Arsenal” is only needed in Hollywood or video games! Besides, if such a thing could ever happen in the first place, you would probably be infected by a virus turning you zombie before you would have time to worry anyway 😛

An ultra rare spider splurge

Trying to sleep is a bloody useless affair, so I got up and spent about 5 minutes on exercise. Something like 30 each of push ups, rows, and situps/reverse crunches. That doesn’t even work off dinner. If I could have peace long enough, I could do an order of magatude more than that in an hour without breaking a sweet.

Booted up the computer after trying to explain to Willow, that it’s a bit impossible to do a situp with a 6kg dog sitting on your chest lol. In going through my usual login ritual, I decided to do something that I rarely ever do: splurge. I’ve bought a copy of Left 4 Dead 2, and at 66% off, it is such a great deal that even I can’t refuse lol. It’s been what, like 2 years since I’ve bought myself something more than an odd pound cake? I’ve still enough left over for my license and fuel needs, so I shouldn’t feel guilty about having a treat.

Ok, maybe it’s weird… survive six months of going nuts because I’m trying to move forward after ~7 years of hell, then I buy a game involving an apocalyptic swarm of zombies just as things start to resemble hopeful. Yep, that’s me in a nut shell.

Now back to exercise…. while the dogs fallen asleep 🙂

Decided to try my hand at UrT, because I really haven’t played anything in a while. Finally had a good run, I was only holding 3rd place tonight lol.

Totally obliterated targets, alternating between riflemen, gunner, and sharpshooter. I nearly had my jaw drop when I racked up at least 3 out of 4 targets killed in about 1.5-2 seconds. If I can see the targets head, I can shoot it!

Just like dropping turkey’s.

A note on teaching what I know

When asked to teach someone something in RvS, I make it a personal policy not to use the [SAS] server or the NTF servers for doing it; I would consider it rude. Ofc, being able to host my own private server helps, lol. I can also always tell people no, hehe, a big change over being assigned to training details.

Now that I’ve spent plenty of years and several thousand hours at the tactics and techniques, I obviously know how to play the game. The part I like however, is since I am free of [SAS]—I don’t have to water down my techniques to that level of game play. I can just play like I want, and treat the clearing like I would if it was a real house. Damn, how many hours did I spend working on that stuff out of game… lol.

UrT, the urbanised terror

There’s just something about leading the score board and having many successful 1 on 2 / 1 on 3 engagements of late, that makes me conclude that Urban Terror just isn’t hard enough…

Where’s the challenge???

A humourous 100th

After throwing the covers off my head and looking over my laptops LCD, I noticed the sun was finally up. So i moved my laptop over to the table I’ve put up next to my desk… thinking I’ll just put my bottle of water on the desk next to me.

Then I had to stop and think for a moment, seeing my Raven Shield disk sitting in that spot: do I really want to use this CD-ROM as a coaster?

In reply to CO Rouges comments about the NTF site move

Another major step for improving the service for our community in the long run, major!

So far, the NTF has passed several milestones in establishing a financially safe, steady, well organized and friendly community for both members and non-members. Ahead, I see several other milestones closing in, as the NTF soon pass its first six months.

source

My response would be (the thread is locked to admins attr), good: now all you have to do is teach your men  how to police your servers with that lovely server admin policy ;).

and I thought [SAS] servers could be a real zoo sometimes, lol.

A chuckle at NTFs expense

In glancing at their roster, I just noticed they have 8 officers to 7 Enlisted, and only just recently did they gain NCOs in that mixture, lol. Some how, I am reminded of something my Grandfather once said about officers…

That NTF has yet to grow past being made up of dissenters and tag alongs is understandable given their pace of movement (I observe about 1.5 x GCHQ speed on average), even if there structure suggests they provision for reaching more than double their present size. I guess none of their planners have heard of the bubble before, hahaha.

At long last, [SAS] has finally dropped my data from the mighty page.

This was drafted a couple days ago (~2), I’ve decided to just edit and annotate it rather than rewrite it.

After giving about a day to see whether or not progress would be made with GCHQs server plans, I formally gave Operation Charlie the green light: extending “An Offer from an Ex-Patriot” to the leadership of [SAS].

This consisted of a short brief with supplemental material to coincide with [SAS]_Maj_WIZ’s obvious two pence worth in accusations. Attached was the offer itself: essentially that I would provide a share in my personal hardware/network resources, to furnish [SAS] with a temporary game server. According to the brief, starting off with one RvS server, and if up to the load, a SWAT 4: TSS server0; but however due to timing issues (See prev-reference to the major) beyond my control, [SAS] would either have to make do as guests on my TS3 or make other arrangements for VoIP. I also noted that depending on when the accept/reject/fu reply was received, my system could be deployed within 15 minutes to 24 hours.

The agreement in the PDF attachment was fairly simple, mostly serving to shield me from any legal liabilities: namely that GCHQ would have to yield any right to kick at yours truly hosting an `[SAS] Interm Server`, delegating adminlogin to [SAS], and like wise making GCHQ responsible should the affair incur any unexpected / freak costs of operation associated with the long term use of it. The ability to print, sign, and therefore scan the document was also provided. All things being what they are, I will only provide the machine under the specified terms being taken into agreement. I reckon that only the OIC or 2IC in absence of the OIC, can appropriately accept the offer without a consensus of some sort among GCHQ. My reasons for enforcing this, has to do with the actions of the Major and Lt. Colonel leading to my resignation: that I while I’ll still put my back into such a breach, I will not do so with a potential noose around my neck for doing so; and their actions would leave a noose there without such an agreement in place. Nothing personal, purely business.

My offer was delivered May 6th, to the four members of [SAS] GCHQ, to the fullest extent of my ability, and the Major has been both personally and professionally aware of my (this) emergency action plan for a couple of years, should it ever be needed in time of trouble. So far, only [SAS]_Capt_JB has shown any regard for this, [SAS]_Maj_WIZ generally expressing indifference and retreat into non-SAS games (What is the old saying, that Nero fiddled whilst Rome burnt? I’d almost call recent affairs treason), [SAS]_CO_Random and [SAS]_Capt_En4cer demonstrating utter uselessness or a shameless level of absenteeism.1

I am more aware of [SAS]’s long term server plans than most, in fact, generally pre-dating NTFs silly Memorandum of Understanding. The purpose of my interm host being offered, being meant to serve as a stop gap until the more permanent solution can be deployed by GCHQ, or if necessary some other arrangement being made if it doesn’t pan out. I find it some what ironic, that quite probably if the ex slackers had dealt from the top of the deck, [SAS] may have been perfectly set financially for another ten years at costs far lower than NTFs with only the cost of a few problem-children to shuffle out to clean the deck for the long haul. Instead the present huddle must be crossed first. Ahh, the bitter sweet retrospect of I told you so ages ago, coming to pass:  it usually tracks my minds for-thought even if I oft’ choose not to say it.

Having been placed into a position, where no other choice remained under my code of conduct but to turn in my warrant, has not changed my feelings towards [SAS], not the part of it that means something. My loyalty was always given to a vision, never to any single or group of members. That why, even from outside the [SAS], I would still extend my hand.

So far, I have received no formal acceptance or rejection of my offer, and if things continue as they are headed, I expect that [SAS] will be totally server-less until GCHQs aims are achieved, or some hurting member pulls a Noer2.

The honest question, is accept, reject, or ignore: whether to take this do-nothing response lying down or take it with axe and sword in hand. As a friend inadvertently reminded me, as I once used to say: when the boat springs a leak, my way is not to jump overboard but to fetch a bucket and help the engineer. That never really has changed about me… lol. Thus, it poses to me the problem: do I watch something that I gave a quarter of my life to in loyal and selfless service to, risk perishing into the abyss, or do I lock, cock, and rock in hopes of bringing order to chaos?

In thinking about this problem, I began trying to evaluate whether or not [SAS]_Maj_WIZ’s recent actions are on par with high treason against the [SAS] 22nd Elite Virtual Regiment, and [SAS]_CO_Random in strong dereliction of duty as good as constituting such, or if they are actively attempting to rip the walls down upon members heads. Random and En4cer may be two of the best officers in [SAS] history, and on a sadly short list of decent ones, but at present are totally useless beyond Randoms financial backing. If the equation evaluates true to treason in the end, and I play that card full force, arguably I could even choose to do so as a senior [SAS] member: as the retention of my data publicly indicates that the resignation of my warrant has not (as of yet) been accepted by the Officer In Charge. That thought, than leads to a pair of sub equatables: can [SAS] survive without them any better than it can with, and what would charging them with treason, make of me? Perhaps I just have good sense enough to do things the proper way, rather than turning underhanded or petty about it. In my opinion these (in)actions have come to warrant expulsion or demotion of a few officers, either now or in the future.

Edit: Since this entry was originally drafted, as if fortune would smile upon a loyal sons troubles, through association with a certain development project3 that I’m involved with, it is possible that [SAS] may be able obtain access to an extremely sexy4 server at such a low cost that would make NTFs heads spin around in circles until it flies off into the stratosphere from the shock. I’ve taken the liberty of informing the Major of this possibility. I’m also willing to make the necessary communication and logistical arrangements to make things happen.

I’ve received no pertinent response from [SAS] on that offer either, but it’s been less than 24 hours on that.

footnotes:
0: Since this was drafted, I’ve heard Walker runs a temp SWAT 4 server whenever he’s gaming.
1: First CO sign I’ve had since well before throwing in my warrant, was seeing the forum index last indicating that Random had posted in the Officers Mess.

2: Noer once came to the rescue, putting his wallet where his heart was after Bronco resigned, taking [SAS]’s only SWAT 4 server with him.
3: Encapsulated Package Installer, EPI ftw!
4: As in such a sexy beast, that you would sell your grandmother and your left nut just for a tenth of that boxes computing power and network pipe!